Wednesday, April 29, 2009

The last exam of my life....

This always happens to me. Every time an exam approaches, I start blaming myself for not having started earlier. I am frankly tired of doing this. If my memory supports me right, I have been doing this since my 1st Standard exam (I have come to this conclusion with some valuable inputs from my parents). And now, I am on the verge of answering virtually the last exam of my life. At least, academically. I say that because, Life, in itself, is an exam forever. But for the time being, let us only focus on the simple Black and White Question paper and the Black and white answer sheet which we are supposed to paint BLUE.

Till my last exam which I answered, which now looks like was my second last one, I had decided to devote clear 3 to 4 months for the Final Semester. Now, when exams are about to start from the 8th of May and I am yet to start (almost), I have no other option but to blame myself all over again. Forget 3 to 4 months, I don't even have four full days per subject. The task is uphill. And confidence level, as always, is on a shaky wicket. But I can't remember a single exam where I have been more confident.

A lot of you must be feeling as to why I am wasting my time on writing all this. Instead, I would have been better off studying. But I had to give a vent to the frustration which is building up with each passing day. Oh hold on.. Each passing Hour.

I am feeling like an employee on the verge of retirement. With my last exam just around the corner, I am mulling over all the missed opportunities. All the days wasted which could have given me those extra marks needed for a distinction. Just like an outgoing employee will think about the opportunities he missed whilst in service which could have given him his promotion. And then, they do something which is quite a common sight. Give advice to others. On the similar lines, my advice to all of you who are going to answer some exam in future; Do study well in advance!!!

Monday, April 27, 2009

I, Me and Myself......

Been thinking about this for a long long time. Been wondering where to start from. Days went by but I could not figure out. So today, I decided that Enough was Enough. I would pen down anything and everything that comes to my mind. No censorship. No reviews. It will be so extempore that I won’t even bother to read it twice. Not even for spelling mistakes.

Lets not waste time on that. Let me introduce myself. The very fact that you are on this page means you know me. But for those, who have accidentally bumped into my blog, here is my brief intro.

I am Giriraj. An Indian by birth. An Indian at heart. And an Indian by religion. Though I was born and brought up in the scenic and picturesque state of Goa, I would still like to identify myself with my country. For I believe, that all Indians are one. That anything which can divide us should be avoided.

Its been tough for me to live with such views. People believe I take too much of importance for myself. People feel I talk about issues which I am not even qualified to talk about. But that’s their view. For me, patriotism means a lot. Not just by saying that I want to help the country but by actually contributing in whatever way I can. You may feel, I have severe political inclinations. But let me tell you. There is loads you can do for your country without joining politics. Best example I can think is of Shri Narayan Murthy. He is politically so aloof but someone, who will make all Indians proud worldwide.

A lot of you may be unsure as to why I am writing all this. But if I don’t express here then where else can it be? As I said earlier, my blog is my punching bag. The more you read, the more you will be convinced as to what I am.

I have lived with many tags in life. Been known as a typical village boy. That’s when I spent whooping 17 years of my life in my native village, a place, which is still very dear to me. Even then, I was known to be arrogant, brash, etc. The reasons for the same are not known to me till date. But those who know me well, will surely disagree. Or at least, I hope they will.

In Mumbai or Pune or Delhi, I was just another Goan with a high flying lifestyle. I was used on so many ocassions as an example of a brat, guy with arrogance, politician and what not. It had to do with my strong views. It had to do with my anti-reservation arguments. It had more to do with my penchant for good food and craze for good restaurants. For me, money is a medium which can allow you to enjoy. But for eternal peace, you need something else. You need a family. You need a sound mind.

I always wanted to and will continue to serve the country in whatever way I can. I am not an atheist but I am not religious either. I am not someone who will leave things to God and expect miracles. I believe that even one person can change a lot of people around him. Initially, they may laugh. And they will. However, if you are focussed, such petty things will hardly bother you.

You can do a lot of things to change the way country functions today. You can join active politics, join an NGO, contribute in newspapers helping in opinion formation, can encourage people to exercise their franchise to ensure the right candidate wins, etc. etc. If I keep writing, I am sure, I will be killed. So believe, for the time being, I better take your leave.

To some, what I am saying may not make any real sense. But as I said, who cares? Now if this is the arrogance that people talk about, then so be it !!!!